Homemakers

Homemakers.  That's what stay-at-home moms were called when my mom was a young mother.  It's a term that I think should make a comeback.  

I don't like the term "stay-at-home" mom.  It's supposed to mean that mom does not work outside the home for pay.  I find it interesting how so many people seem to believe that if you prioritize your parenthood over a career that means you don't have any sort of life or outside interests or even socialization with anyone but your kids.   They think it means you have no skills either. 

That's why I think "homemaking" needs to make a comeback.  What is a homemaker?  A homemaker is one who makes a home.  What does it take to make a home? It takes a myriad of skills.

As a homemaker, you are basically the CEO  of your household.  You manage the schedules.  You plan, and often cook, the meals.  You care for sick children (and husbands--let's be real here).  You play the part of chauffeur, teacher, nurse, maid, coach, cook, librarian, personal shopper, commanding officer, and so much more.  

But let's apply this to mothers in general.  It really doesn't seem to matter whether you do this as your full-time gig and nothing else on the side or you have another career.  It takes skills to manage a household.  You can work forty hours a week and be a homemaker.  You can volunteer untold hours with any organization and still be a homemaker.  You can work mornings, nights, part-time, from home, and still be a homemaker.  

Let's stop pitting mothers against each other.  Some mothers want to have an established career because it gives them more of a sense of purpose.  Other mothers prefer to focus solely on their family and children because that's where they derive their purpose.  Others have to bring home a paycheck just to pay the bills.  Others have financial woes but believe that being a mother first is so important that they choose to struggle financially instead.  

Nobody is wrong here.  Homemaking skills are skills that any mother, whether she is gone from the house fifty hours a week or home twenty-four seven can develop.  

Let's bring back homemaking and appreciate all hard-working mothers who are doing everything they can to raise their children right to the best of their ability.

A Letter to My Child's Teacher on the Last Day of School

Dear Teacher,

Every weekday for the past nine months, you have been a central figure in the life of my child.  When the school year started, my child was so excited to meet the teacher.  Then they met you and you became their world.  They would come home and tell me things like, "My teachers says..." or come to ask me a question and say, "Mrs....oh, I mean Mom."  I know my child did that to you too, calling you Mom because it happened to me a lot when I was a teacher.

I am their mother.  I am their home.  I care for their basic needs of food, clothing, shelter, love, and other needs and wants.  But you are also a key component in their development.  They are with you for more than a thousand hours of their year.  

I am so glad they got you as their teacher.  Every year I worry that their teacher won't be the right fit for them.  I know that most teachers and most kids can manage fine and everything will work out, with a few bumps here and there, but I also know that sometimes, the teacher and the child do not match.  Personalities clash and it makes for a hard, long school year.  More than one of my children have had such a teacher, but we teach them to persevere and get through it and hopefully they learn about getting along with others along the way.  I'm glad that this year, they had the right fit.  

Now, as the school year comes to an end, I reflect on how much they've grown and how you've been a part of that, and I become a little sad.  I realize what a great experience the year has been for them and I'm sad that it's over.  I'm sad that you are no longer their teacher.  I realize that through the year, I have developed a relationship of trust with you and a little part of me grieves at the thought that it is over.  I want you to know all that you have done to help my child progress has been wonderful.  I will miss you as my child's teacher.

Every year at the end, I find myself sad for these reasons.  I wish you the best, I truly do.  I always feel even more sad if I learn of your retirement from teaching, or that you are moving to another school.  But I also understand that you must do what is right for you.  

Thank you for being my child's teacher.  Thank you for the work you have done and will do.  I don't think a personalized cup for teacher appreciation week is enough to let you know of my appreciation.  I'm not a great gift-giver and can't ever think of anything that would really express that gratitude.  So I write this heartfelt letter instead for you to know what you have meant to my family this year.  

Sincerely,

Your student's mother