Stomach Virus, You Have Beat Me, I Surrender

I need to vent. My oldest child is sick with a stomach illness AGAIN. He was sick from December 15th through the 18th with this bug. Then he was fine for two days. Then on the 21st, he started throwing up again and having diarrhea and then that seemed to subside a little on the 23rd. Over Christmas, from the 24th through the 27th, he was sick again with it. On the 27th we took him in and the doctor ran tons of tests. They all came back negative. At that point, he seemed to be doing better and starting on December 28th seemed back to his usual self. But starting yesterday, one week later, he started feeling grouchy and tired with an upset stomach again. Today he has been throwing up bile pretty violently since about 7:30 a.m.

But it's not only him. I was sick on December 27th and 28th and bad enough that I had to go in to the hospital for i.v. fluids. My third child, age 4, started with the diarrhea on December 27th also and he didn't improve until Friday, the 31st. He was well over the weekend, but on Tuesday, January 4th, he started with the diarrhea again, which turned back into throwing up and he has been sick with vomiting since yesterday morning.

And that's not all. My daughter, who is the youngest, had a one-day bout with diarrhea and vomiting (December 22nd) but she seems fine since (knock on wood). My second son had a one-day bout with diarrhea on Christmas Day. My husband hasn't had the stomach bug, but he's had issues with vertigo and neck stiffness since January 1st.

Okay, I've had it. I can't even think straight anymore. This sickness is all-consuming. I feel like life sucks terribly. I feel like there's no point in praying or getting blessings (which there have been many blessings administered, all to no avail). When my 7-year-old asked me to call someone to come give him a blessing an hour ago, I told him no. I honestly feel like what is the point. I've been praying for guidance on how to nip this thing in the bud, but I get no answers, no directions.

I feel totally hopeless and alone. I feel like I'm walking on eggshells every second and that at any minute, one of my other kids will start vomiting. I'd like to ship them away to healthy homes until this is gone just so they don't get it. But I have nobody to help me out. My mom lives far away, my mother-in-law lives far away, my siblings and their spouses and everyone lives in another state. My visiting teachers don't answer their phones; the RS president doesn't answer her phone; the compassionate service leader is not answering her phone. Where is everyone?

Life is pointless right now. My son is now missing his 5th day of school due to this illness. He's had every blood test and urine test out there and all came back negative. He's perfectly healthy, meaning this is just some bad virus that keeps hitting him. Why does it keep hitting him? What have I done wrong as a mother that my son is so susceptible to this?

And yes, I'm very angry at God right now. Seriously, three weeks of this with no end in sight? I'm afraid to feed my children anything. I'm afraid to eat anything myself. I have cleaned and scrubbed this house clean, so much so that my hands are dry and cracking due to all the cleaning. I have washed loads and loads of sheets, pillowcases, blankets, clothes, and towels. Every day I do at least 3-4 loads of wash. I've used Lysol wipes all over the entire house.

We've gone through bottles and bottles of Powerade, applesauce, Gingerale, 7-up. I don't even know what to grocery shop for anymore, the kids can't eat anything I buy. I just am overwhelmed. I don't know what to do.

Should I call the CDC? I mean, seriously, 3 weeks!?! It's hit two of my kids multiple times, one of them is on his FOURTH round of it. He is throwing up nothing but mucus and bile. The doctors can't do anything. He's not dehydrated. He's not feverish. The only symptoms are diarrhea and vomiting.

Between bouts of it, they all feel fine. They've even been trying to eat normal food because I've been letting them eat what sounds good to them. Maybe I should just let them go without anything to eat and only drink for 24-48 hours. I don't know what else to do. I'm at my wits end. I'd like to hop in my minivan and drive as far away as I can and not come back.

Sorry, but the pregnancy hormones are probably worsening the helplessness I feel. I just don't know what to do.

And the fact that money is in short supply around here doesn't help either. Just adds a whole new level to the stress.